Mom was BLUE

I began my training on personality in early 2011.  A couple of months earlier, my mother was diagnosed with ALS.

Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis

Also known as Lou Gehrig’s disease.


By the time I was a master trainer on personality, she was unable to walk.  About one month before she was forced to relocate to a nursing home, I gave her the personality assessment.


She dies two months later, one month after checking into Prairie Manor Nursing home.

During those last two months, while they were unbelievably sad, causing much of my behavior to be “out of esteem”, I was able to better understand why the relationship between her and I had often been less than great over the years.

BLUE:  Harmonizer.  She was a people person.  She was sensitive, caring, and wanted people to get along and not be hateful or hurtful.  In the 64 years of her life, 18 of which I lived in the same house, I can remember only two or three times when she said a bad thing about anybody.  And when she did, it went something like this:  “That Jane Doe……… I don’t care for her……..”

Even back then, as a teenager, I would chuckle when she made a comment like that.

My last color is BLUE.

I respect people’s feelings, and certainly much more now, especially when dealing with a BLUE person.  But the process and/or the product is more important to me than how somebody is feeling.  Close personal relationships are also important to me, but not at the expense of everything else in my life.

I went years without having a one on one conversation with my mother about my life.  I wasn’t interested.  And it was because inevitably, I would be ORANGE and talk about how I was going to win this tournament, or be better than that person, and it would come across to my mom as caustic and cold blooded.

18 YELLOW:  She was also organized.  She followed rules.  You did certain things a certain way, because…………”that’s what you are supposed to do”

My second to last color is YELLOW, and my primary is ORANGE, which is her last color.  YELLOW and ORANGE are opposite.

I don’t care for rules, and I get joy out of breaking them.  I am not always proud of it, but it really mainly comes down to me not at all, not one iota, not even from my mother, appreciating being told what to do.  I will likely do the opposite. 

Here first two colors:  20 BLUE.  18 YELLOW.

My last two colors:  11 YELLOW.  10 BLUE

She and I were always going to struggle with having a non-stressful relationship.  UNLESS we learned about each other.

We had two months of this.  And even though I still have regrets about my behavior, I take comfort in thinking about those first few days after learning her color spectrum.  We talked about the colors, and our differences.  We laughed.  We cried, we bonded.

She was BLUE to the very end.  I was in California working with a client when she decided the breathing mask wasn’t going to happen.  My sister told her that she would contact me to come home asap.  My mom said no.  He needs to help his client. She was BLUE and YELLOW even when standing at death’s doorstep.

I made it home in time to hold her hand while she took her last breath.

Stay Colorful. 

Newer Post

Leave a comment

Please note, comments must be approved before they are published